Review of Raleigh, North Carolina


Not the Southern State You're Looking For
Star Rating - 4/22/2021
TLDR: I'm shocked how cold the people are here and not at all what I would expect from a Southern state. If you're looking for a Southern state with that "Southern charm" near the beach or otherwise and escape from cold weather this is "a place." NC has warmer weather compared to any Northern state, but the people are just as cold(if not colder) than the weather you want to forget. Here are my thoughts and background. I'm originally from south AL - 2.5 hours from Panama City Beach. When I was younger I moved with my parents to Rocky Mount, NC. I remember having many friends and many great memories alongside the troubles you get into as a kid. Overall, I had fond memories of the place. Soon after we moved to East TN. I lived there for 22 years before I moved back to NC with an, at the time, SO. East TN was quaint yet beautiful and charming in it's own right. Mountains, weather, people were mostly warm and cheerful. There's some in-between caught in the mix but overall I was spoiled with my hometown. Although where I lived was a large major city, it felt like you could talk to almost anyone and even small talk was given a smile or positive response - if anything a head nod and smile would accompany a "Hey" or "Good Morning" etc. Fast forward and I move to Raleigh. Saying it was a culture shock would be an understatement. Views are pretty and there's quite a bit to do, but the people here frankly suck. I've met a few good people in the year I've lived here and even then meeting 4 good friends is shocking to me. People at my upscale complex were snobs. Passing people on the sidewalk is like walking by someone with passive aggression. Heads are down hoping they don't have to say hello or lock eyes ever again, or worse. They pretend you don't exist. I'm a chatasmatic person. So I automatically smile and say "Hi" or "Good morning" but most of the time words are ignored and rarely reciprocated. Ultimately, a sense of community here is not felt. Roads are bad. Traffic is worse. Crime rate isn't great either. After protests, shootings, fires and other awful acts Downtown Raleigh is all but a great outing. A lot of businesses have plywood boarded from broken windows and other places are decimated. Prices are high and unless you have a large group of friends, you'll be alone. My time in Raleigh was terrible. I eventually moved to Holly Springs which is quiet, but still shallow at best. Stay away unless you enjoy this secluded feel. Just my two cents. I'm sure others will have different experiences and I welcome a conversation. Hope this helped.
Chase | Holly Springs, NC
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9 Replies


This review makes me laugh. Your comments about East TN completely invalidate your review. "East TN was quaint yet beautiful and charming in it's own right. Mountains, weather, people were mostly warm and cheerful." East TN is one of the most depressing places I have ever been - No job opportunities, extremely conservative and close-minded church-centered culture, no good restaurants apart from chains, very impoverished and infested with opioid and crystal meth addiction. While attending my grandfather's funeral, one of the fine individuals from East TN broke into my grandmother's home and stole my grandfather's prized possessions. Absolutely vile. Theft, presumably to feed drug addiction, is common. These people have no morals and will happily steal from you and lie to your face. Had another situation where a painter showed up and collected money and then never did the job. Oh and he also stole from my other grandmother's home. They eventually moved to Raleigh and love it. Drug addiction and extreme poverty is common in East TN due to lack of job opportunities and poor education. Raleigh is not perfect but it is 1000 percent better than anywhere in East TN. Raleigh is not as "southern" as East TN because people from all over the world actually want to move there unlike East TN which is losing young people every year in search of greener pastures. This diversity in Raleigh is what makes it such a great place to live - fantastic food and lots of different cultural events and sports. It also helps to fight close-mindedness and shocking and complacent ignorance which is a core part of the culture in places like Bristol, Greeneville, Kingsport, etc where the only cultural events are going to a Church outing where 90% of the congregation is over 80.
Harvey | Seattle, WA | Report Abuse

This review makes me laugh. Your comments about East TN completely invalidate your review. "East TN was quaint yet beautiful and charming in it's own right. Mountains, weather, people were mostly warm and cheerful." East TN is one of the most depressing places I have ever been - No job opportunities, extremely conservative and close-minded church-centered culture, no good restaurants apart from chains, very impoverished and infested with opioid and crystal meth addiction. While attending my grandfather's funeral, one of the fine individuals from East TN broke into my grandmother's home and stole my grandfather's prized possessions. Absolutely vile. Theft, presumably to feed drug addiction, is common. These people have no morals and will happily steal from you and lie to your face. Had another situation where a painter showed up and collected money and then never did the job. Oh and he also stole from my other grandmother's home. They eventually moved to Raleigh and love it. Drug addiction and extreme poverty is common in East TN due to lack of job opportunities and poor education. Raleigh is not perfect but it is 1000 percent better than anywhere in East TN. Raleigh is not as "southern" as East TN because people from all over the world actually want to move there unlike East TN which is losing young people every year in search of greener pastures. This diversity in Raleigh is what makes it such a great place to live - fantastic food and lots of different cultural events and sports. It also helps to fight close-mindedness and shocking and complacent ignorance which is a core part of the culture in places like Bristol, Greeneville, Kingsport, etc. The only cultural events in East TN are going to a church outing where 90% of the congregation is over 80 (again because young people are getting the hell out) and then going to Pizza Hut or Long John Silvers for dinner while having a nice pyramid cigarette (East TN's preferred brand) for dessert.
Harvey | Seattle, WA | Report Abuse

This is interesting because we were visiting Chapel Hill for 6 days over the Memorial Day weekend in '21 -- and while I expect friendliness from hotel staff, we were overwhelmed by the friendliness of total strangers. For example -- I was at the "Carrboro end" of Franklin street, and had pulled around the corner and was parking my car when I suddenly wondered if it was really ok to park there. As I was wondering, a woman -- just walking by on the sidewalk, probably mid-to-late 50s (like me) stopped and smiled and I rolled down my window...she asked if I was looking for a place to park? And told me there was a parking lot down the street. This kind of thing seemed common. I'm a native of San Francisco and if I ever seen anyone with a map out or looking confused at a bus stop, etc. I will always stop and ask if I can be of assistance. We live 3 doors from GGPark -- which gets tourists from all over the world. It's larger than NYC's Central Park and easy to get turned around, so I always ask people if I can help them -- do they maybe need a bathroom? Looking for a place to eat? People are amazed that I do this because MY city is now flooded with "blow ins" from all over the world whose goals in life seems to be to 1: Get Rich and 2: Appear to "Be Cool." Sick of it. Was SO nice to be amongst people who wanted to take a moment to "visit" for a couple of minutes, whose speech wasn't filled with "s--t" and "f--k", who would ask how you are, o ask to greet you as one human being to another. (My city, alas, has changed, too -- and sadly, not for the better.)
steve | San Francisco, CA | Report Abuse


I agree. I've lived here since 1998. It's been difficult making and keeping friends. It's a very transient city. The friends I've made have moved to more interesting cities. Scores make schools look good but they are ridiculously overcrowded. Drugs in schools is a very real problem with heroine being the biggest issue. Housing prices are very high. It's a college town so tons of students. Teen life is challenging here for most of the kids I know. They say it's boring. A very car dependant city. Lots of suburban sprawl. Friends here are made at work or at church. The other main activity is drinking in bars. You're correct, thr biggest complaint I hear is "I feel lonely ". There are small pockets of neighborhoods that are engaging as a community, but houses in those neighborhoods rarely go up for sale. Check out Zillow "sold recently " and see how fast people move in and out. It offers amenities but plan to do things alone. For many people Raleigh becomes a too good to leave too bad to stay kind of a place. It seems fun, but then it isn't. I'm in north Raleigh at Wake Forest city line.
J | Raleigh, NC | Report Abuse

Raleigh is too good to leave too bad to stay. *Schools horribly overcrowded. Heroine is a big issue but not talked about. Test scores make schools appear better than they are. When we moved here my son asked if he had failed a grade because school was almost 2 years behind where he'd been academically. *Downtown isn't really walkable. Tons of students. The city has spread out "pockets". Check out Zillow ,"recently sold" and see how fast houses turn over. It's a very transient city which doesn't help build a sense of community. Older communities are more established but pricey and difficult to find a house for sale as Zillow can help show. Most people don't know their neighbors. *Great for college students, families with small children. Boring for teens. Difficult for couples. Lonely for single adults. Great if you own a boat, go to church or like hanging out at bars. Lots of amenities but plan to go alone, unless you have family and can find a drinking buddy. As stated in anothercomment, on paper it has everything you want. In reality it's fairly boring. *I lived in Wilmington NC for 4 years. Loved it despite it being #1 in US for opioid use, very high crime and 42 active gangs. It's a port city with highway 40 to Los Angeles and close to highway 95. Unfortunately, Wilmington has changed for the worst with high priced housing taking over and schools overcrowding. The movie industry left, that hurt. It's crazy packed crowded now. I was really sad to leave. I'm looking at Tennessee now. Huntsville AL and west of it, Madison, are nice areas as well. Good luck!
J | Raleigh, NC | Report Abuse

Raleigh is too good to leave too bad to stay. *Schools horribly overcrowded. Heroine is a big issue but not talked about. Test scores make schools appear better than they are. When we moved here my son asked if he had failed a grade because school was almost 2 years behind where he'd been academically. *Downtown isn't really walkable. Tons of students. The city has spread out "pockets". Check out Zillow ,"recently sold" and see how fast houses turn over. It's a very transient city which doesn't help build a sense of community. Older communities are more established but pricey and difficult to find a house for sale as Zillow can help show. Most people don't know their neighbors. *Great for college students, families with small children. Boring for teens. Difficult for couples. Lonely for single adults. Great if you own a boat, go to church or like hanging out at bars. Lots of amenities but plan to go alone, unless you have family and can find a drinking buddy. As stated in anothercomment, on paper it has everything you want. In reality it's fairly boring. *I lived in Wilmington NC for 4 years. Loved it despite it being #1 in US for opioid use, very high crime and 42 active gangs. It's a port city with highway 40 to Los Angeles and close to highway 95. Unfortunately, Wilmington has changed for the worst with high priced housing taking over and schools overcrowding. The movie industry left, that hurt. It's crazy packed crowded now. I was really sad to leave. I'm looking at Tennessee now. Huntsville AL and west of it, Madison, are nice areas as well. Good luck!
J | Raleigh, NC | Report Abuse

Raleigh is too good to leave too bad to stay. *Schools horribly overcrowded. Heroine is a big issue but not talked about. Test scores make schools appear better than they are. When we moved here my son asked if he had failed a grade because school was almost 2 years behind where he'd been academically. *Downtown isn't really walkable. Tons of students. The city has spread out "pockets". Check out Zillow ,"recently sold" and see how fast houses turn over. It's a very transient city which doesn't help build a sense of community. Older communities are more established but pricey and difficult to find a house for sale as Zillow can help show. Most people don't know their neighbors. *Great for college students, families with small children. Boring for teens. Difficult for couples. Lonely for single adults. Great if you own a boat, go to church or like hanging out at bars. Lots of amenities but plan to go alone, unless you have family and can find a drinking buddy. As stated in anothercomment, on paper it has everything you want. In reality it's fairly boring. *I lived in Wilmington NC for 4 years. Loved it despite it being #1 in US for opioid use, very high crime and 42 active gangs. It's a port city with highway 40 to Los Angeles and close to highway 95. Unfortunately, Wilmington has changed for the worst with high priced housing taking over and schools overcrowding. The movie industry left, that hurt. It's crazy packed crowded now. I was really sad to leave. I'm looking at Tennessee now. Huntsville AL and west of it, Madison, are nice areas as well. Good luck!
J | Raleigh, NC | Report Abuse

Raleigh is too good to leave too bad to stay. *Schools horribly overcrowded. Heroine is a big issue but not talked about. Test scores make schools appear better than they are. When we moved here my son asked if he had failed a grade because school was almost 2 years behind where he'd been academically. *Downtown isn't really walkable. Tons of students. The city has spread out "pockets". Check out Zillow ,"recently sold" and see how fast houses turn over. It's a very transient city which doesn't help build a sense of community. Older communities are more established but pricey and difficult to find a house for sale as Zillow can help show. Most people don't know their neighbors. *Great for college students, families with small children. Boring for teens. Difficult for couples. Lonely for single adults. Great if you own a boat, go to church or like hanging out at bars. Lots of amenities but plan to go alone, unless you have family and can find a drinking buddy. As stated in anothercomment, on paper it has everything you want. In reality it's fairly boring. *I lived in Wilmington NC for 4 years. Loved it despite it being #1 in US for opioid use, very high crime and 42 active gangs. It's a port city with highway 40 to Los Angeles and close to highway 95. Unfortunately, Wilmington has changed for the worst with high priced housing taking over and schools overcrowding. The movie industry left, that hurt. It's crazy packed crowded now. I was really sad to leave. I'm looking at Tennessee now. Huntsville AL and west of it, Madison, are nice areas as well. Good luck!
J | Raleigh, NC | Report Abuse
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