Portland is awful but Tigard is much, much worse!
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5/4/2006
Tigard has all of the nasty weather (9 months rain, 3 months unbearable heat - note that Oregonians are pasty faced and pudgy due to the lousy weather chasing everyone inside 99% of the time) and none of the ammenities of Portland.
Tigard has the out-of-control children growing up sociopathic with their incredibly rude, incredibly arrogant parents who think that popping out kids means they are entitled to be absolute pigs to everyone else. As a result, you get to pay taxes to keep kids in school who are vandals, bullies, lazy little brats.
Apparently Portland is 46th (it's campaign season) in education --- what? How is that possible in a supposedly liberal LOL Pacific NW state?
It's possible because, the ugly little secret is that Oregon is actually a backwards red state. Outside of Portland and, perhaps, Eugene the rest of Oregon is bigoted, redneck, ignorant country. It's mostly rural as no one wants to live here unless they'ved failed in California or Washington and have to flee to lower cost housing.
The 'burbs aren't much better because they're still pulling from the same population. In fact, the 'burbs are probably worse because Oregonians, not having actual substance, pretend to be 'sophisticated' LOL by blindly copying everyone else. The plastic little houses jammed up against one another are depressingly without character. They all have the same trailer-trash-meets-Martha-Stewart-but-only-at-Kmart look.
It's a suburban nightmare come to life LOL!
If you are sentenced to live in Oregon, make sure you bring lots of anti-depressants, lots of blankets and lots of extra lighting....you will need it. You will also need lots of round-up because mother nature in Oregon hates people and is always trying to cover everything in moss, algae and blackberry bushes. The theory is that, if humans left (WHAT A GOOD IDEA!) in 5 years 'nature' which is a malevolent presence here will have covered, ripped up and digested all vestiges of what passes for 'civilization'.
If you are sentenced, god be with you, to Oregon make sure you sign up for liposuction, weight watchers, psychiatric counseling and two weeks in any sunny locale. Oregon will make you insane.
This is why Oregon is such a large state but has virtually no people in it except at the very NW tip.
Amy | ,